While in Washington DC, I attended the presentations of a lot, really a lot, of AI papers, and I got finally convinced of one, uncomfortable reality. Naturally, writing about AI is a matter of rigour, ingenuity and proper use of concepts, but that is not the end. Rethorics, indeed, is a big deal too. It is in any field (and generally in life) but each subject matter has its own kind. So I started to look for regular patterns, and here is the result. A guide, from dummies to dummies, to write scientifically sound papers about AI. Did the world need it? Probably not. Do you need it? Read and measure your current level!